Three self-reflection tools
None of these assess your relationship and none of them are stored. They exist to turn a vague, heavy feeling into something specific enough to say out loud or do this week.
How you show and receive affection
Five plain preference questions. It gives you a style in plain language — never a ranking of you or your partner, and never a score.
What this is based on
- The questions cover how affection is initiated, what form it usually takes, timing, response to a partner's bid, and what 'enough' feels like.
- Outcomes describe a style, never a level. No style is presented as more loving, more mature or better than another.
What it cannot tell you: It describes a tendency, not a fixed trait, and it says nothing about your relationship. Two people with very different results can be a very good match.
Runs entirely in your browser.
An affection style is a preference, not a diagnosis
Nothing here ranks you or your partner. Knowing your own style — and theirs — is mostly useful because it turns 'you never touch me' into something far more specific and far easier to ask for.
Conversation planner
Tick what you actually want this conversation to achieve. It composes an opening line and a short, usable script from what you tick.
What this is based on
- The goals are the things people most often say afterwards they wish they'd been clear about before they started talking.
- The script opens with a specific, ownable request rather than a general complaint, which is what keeps a first conversation from reading as an accusation.
What it cannot tell you: A script is not the conversation itself, and no wording survives contact with a real person exactly as written. Treat it as a starting shape, not a performance to get right.
Runs entirely in your browser. Your answers are never sent anywhere, never stored, and never written into the web address.
The Affection & Connection Guide
A practical guide to closeness, touch and building a ritual that lasts.
Get the free guide →Connection ritual planner
Tick the moments in your week where a small ritual could actually live. It composes two or three rituals sized to fit them — nothing that needs a calendar invite.
What this is based on
- Rituals attached to a moment that already exists in the day survive far longer than ones that need a new slot invented from scratch.
- Every ritual here is under ten minutes on purpose — the goal is something that happens on a bad week, not just a good one.
What it cannot tell you: A ritual only works if you both actually do it. Pick fewer than you're tempted to; one kept ritual beats three abandoned ones.
Runs entirely in your browser.
You can talk to someone instead
Verified couples counsellors and relationship-course partners, plus free directories. Listed plainly, and labelled where they're commercial.
See the resources →